Lessons Learned From Developing Mentor-Mentee Relationships

I could not just tell you about the benefits and great things about mentoring without sharing the troubles I have encountered both as a mentor and mentee.

As a mentor, I had to realize that I serve as a mentor, not a licensed counselor, some of the problems my mentees face are beyond me, and that's okay. However, those experiences allowed me to understand what areas I can serve in and what areas I cannot serve. I had to be honest with myself and know when to point them toward someone who could better assist them.

As a mentor, I have lost mentees, too; honestly, it is not the best feeling in the world. Those lessons taught me that some mentor-mentee relationships are not forever; I have served my purpose in their life and their purpose in my life. I have also lost mentees due to misalignment and miscommunication. I was not asking the right questions in establishing the mentor-mentee relationship, only to find out that there were expectations that were expected of me that I was not aware of.

As a mentee, I have had the opportunity to be in great mentoring programs. Although the intentions of matching me with a mentor may have been great, there were instances where I felt that the relationship was forced. The chemistry was off, and the mentor-mentee relationship was temporary, which is also okay.

To avoid wasting time as a mentee, when I seek someone out to be my mentor, it's chemistry; it's confirming it is not forced. The relationship organically grows into a mentor-mentee relationship.

To ensure I am aligned with a mentee, I ask questions for clarification and understanding. Questions that I now ask and encourage you to ask when you are approached by someone who wants you to be their mentor: (also, keep in mind the generations that you are better able to serve) For me. I serve college students, so my questions are explicitly geared toward college students.

What is your major?

What are your expectations?

Are you an only child? Do you have siblings?

What is it that you would like to learn from me?

How can I assist you?

Are you active in organizations?

At some point in the conversation, I ask these questions, or as they are telling me about themselves, they answer them along the way.

It is essential to understand that mentor-mentee relationships should be mutually beneficial for both the mentor and the mentee. Both should be developed in the process.

How are you developing your mentor-mentee relationships? What questions are you asking before establishing your mentor-mentee relationships?

I can't wait to read your answers below Kings and Queens..

Comments: 

Calandra M. Williams 3 years ago · 1 Like

Just as you so you stated the mentee/mentee mentor relationship should be an even exchange between both parties. Being a mentor/mentee has held me accountable, strengthened my faith and given me hope. It has helped me grow in ways unimaginable and I have to live a spirit led life.

Kassadee Dews 3 years ago · 1 Like

I love this topic

TEdra Knox